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You can have your/firecracker/One bang and gone/Have at her/But I tell you what/She's still here, ma coconut/
Mighty fine your/vine/of tomatoes/takes lots for sauce/I suppose/come on down to my hut/it's just me and ma coconut/
Lord I love ma coconut/Did you ever love a lovely coconut/like forever/well/she fell for me/and she knocked me out/and I woke up/oh no/oh no/don't go/oh no/ma coconut!
Lord I love ma coconut/Did you ever love a lovely coconut/like forever/well/she fell for me/and she knocked me out/and I woke up/oh no/oh no/don't go/oh no/ma coconut!
Lick your latest/lollipop/all day suckers/start and stop/me all i/see/ is the treetop/glory be ma coconut/
Chase away your/foxes and chicks/soon enough/you’re lost in the sticks/but I tell/you what/I caught ma coconut/
Lord I love ma coconut/Did you ever love a lovely coconut/like forever/well/she fell for me/and she knocked me out/and I woke up/oh no/oh no/don't go/oh no/ma coconut!
I'm a put a lime/in the coconut/drink it all in/live it up...
credits
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(Like me?/They Like me!/They love me!...)
They Love Me /They Love Me /They love me they do/
Ooh I'm richly adored/They love me/They love me/
Thru and thru/Oh my Lord!
Despite the great black/and the little white lies/Despite the complaints/nightly itemized/
Though cheap be my skate/and skin be my flint/
It's/all/right.../
They Love Me /They Love Me /They love me they do/
Ooh I'm richly adored/They love me/They love me/
Thru and thru/Oh my Lord!
Up they run/like Schnauzers to see me/
as I shuffle in/cursing and late/
kick them or kiss them/it's all the same/
It seems/my charms are innate/
They Love Me /They Love Me /They love me they do/
Ooh I'm richly adored/They love me/They love me/
Thru and thru/Oh my Lord!
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20 people at the DMV/saw the Commissar threatening me/
20 people set to testify/until....
Accidents/incidents/whittled them/down to two/to me and to you/
Secretary's in the estuary/Short order cook was found in the brook/
but don't let it trouble you/I can still lose that black BMW...
And you are my/last/reliable witness/and if you're not scared shitless/
you probably should be/Probably/you should be.../
You’re my/last/reliable witness/and if you’re doubting justice/
you probably should be/Probably you should be.../
HR lady's dead in her Mercedes/
that Contractor's in a trash compactor/Grand jury be a piece of cake/
only one goon trailing us left to shake/
And you are my/last/reliable witness/and if you're not scared shitless/
you probably should be/Probably/you should be.../
You’re my/last/reliable witness/and if you’re doubting justice/
you probably should be/Probably you should be.../
Sales associate/drowned in a toilet/
Beautician sleeps with the fish n'/that Community Organizer/
he’s now fertilizer/This still might fail if/they already got to the bailiff.../
And you are my/last/reliable witness/certifiable/reliable/viable…
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Nothing good ever seems good enough/Everybody else has got all the stuff/
No one surely ever had it as rough/as your generation.../
Don’t draw your gun/if i draw one/or two/generalizations/
I’m just talkin’ about your/generation.../
Your generation/ADD/Your generation/OMG/IMHO,/
you will not be/friending me/texting me/sexting me/tweeting me/or anyone with whom you disagree.../
Nobody ever ought to work/much less slave/
Everybody ought to relax and rave/Civilization grew to condo from cave/
for your generation.../
Don’t flash your mob/if I lob/one or two/characterizations/
I’m just talkin’ about your/generation.../
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5. |
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I guess I/never knew/anything at all about you/Love denied/
If I were you/I’d be mystified, too…/
There must have been so much more to see/than I ever saw/
By what secret law/is it “classified?”/
I guess I/never knew/anything at all about you/Love denied/
If I were you/I’d be mystified, too…/
Part escape act/partly sleight-of-hand/Oh, my darling/
Am I right to understand/the mute Modus Operandi/
the uncanny camouflage/hammered into place/
as effect and cause?
Like the rest I’m left to here to guess/
what you really thought/Farm girl or robot?/
Bald Rapunzel?
I guess I/never knew/anything at all about you/Love denied/
If I were you/I’d be mystified, too…/
credits
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6. |
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I wrote this song two years ago/ recorded it a few months back/Now I play it/almost every night/How many times/I've lost track/
This song was written by/somebody else/ somebody I used to be/ I don't believe/a word of it now/
but it's damn catchy,/
Kinda rocks/kinda sad/kinda clever/kinda/payback-by-playback/Kinda unkind/and I'm sorry 'bout that.../
I wrote this song two years ago/shortly after we broke up/Now I roll/my eyes at the same lines/that used to/choke me up/
This song just magically/wrote itself/or so I say in interviews/But sales exploded/and now I'm loaded/Credit's hard to refuse,/
Kinda rocks/kinda sad/kinda clever/kinda/payback-by-playback/Kinda unkind/and I'm sorry 'bout that.../
One day you'll wonder where/this one-hit wonder went /if this song plays/
someday at some wedding,/
To my amusement/look at the time I've spent/finally/forgetting!/
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7. |
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Off goes the rent/in an envelope/to the landlady,/to the bank,/I hope/
someday to to cut the landlady out/
of the equation,/She's absentee and far-east asian,/
and hates to love me, too, no doubt.../
Off goes the rent,/Up comes the sun/Someone's gotta take the blame/
but there's no one/
Off goes the rent/Down falls the rain/I look around for a little love to ease the pain,/
A little love can ease the existential pain.../
Off goes the payment/to Toyota/Later on I'll pay the cable bill for Ray Liotta/
and other actors I recognize/but can't name/
More and more Brits each season/playing yanks for some reason/
I watch and wonder just the same...
Off goes the rent,/Up comes the sun/Someone's gotta take the blame/
but there's no one/
Off goes the rent/Down falls the rain/I look around for a little love to ease the pain,/
A little love can ease the existential pain.../
Yeggle-dester deggle-day/luggle-dove was suggle-dutch/
an eagle-deasy geggle-dame to pleggle-day,/
Nowggle-dow I neegle-deed/a pleggle-dace/
to hyggle-dide a-weggle-day.../
credits
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8. |
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'Round about now/you’ve lost your phone/'Round about now/you’re on your own/
'Round about now/we’ll understand/'round about now/how you bite the hand/feeding you/
clean through/the bone/
And the jig is begun/'round about now/You better run home, hon’/'round about now/
“Do unto...”/as you come/undone.../
'Round about now a fool heart breaks/'Round about now/you shook the shakes/
'Round about now/you’re a Girl Gone Wild/'Round about now/you’re nobody’s child/if you die before you wake/
And the jig is begun/'round about now/You better run home, hon’/'round about now/
“Do unto...”/as you come/undone.../
Morbid motel room,/'round about now,/with the rose off your bloom,/'round about now,/
well, the bell tolls/not for whom...?/
You never met a manic phase you didn’t like,/Roadrunner rage on a rocket bike/
off the cliffs of chemistry:/look down, Wyle E., “Yike.”/
And the jig is begun/'round about now/You better run home, hon’/'round about now/
“Do unto...”/as you come/undone.../
And your heartbeat is thundering,/'round about now/as we sit home wondering,/
'round about now/how will it end/'round about now/or start over again?/'round about now,/
'Round about/'round about/'round about/'round about/
'Round about/'round about/'round about/'round about/
'Round about/'round about/'round about/'round about now…/
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9. |
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Nasty business/taking Nashville/town/
Having cried, “Havoc!”/and loosed the war hound/
I’ve been laid low/but I’ve never laid down/
on Smokey Row…/Smokey Row…/
Ought to get a gut full/of popskull/and giddy-up/
for the love of a soiled dove/or a silky Cypriot,/
Fool enough to go/(lo, but I’m no idiot)/
to Smokey Row…/Smokey Row…/
And I will not go/No, I will not go/on furlough/for long/to Smokey Row…/
And I will not go/No, I will not go/on furlough/for long/to Smokey Row…/
Smokey Row…Smokey Row…
And I will not go/No, I will not go/on furlough/for long/to Smokey Row…/
And I will not go/No, I will not go/on furlough/for long/to Smokey Row…/
Smokey Row…Smokey Row…
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I woke up at the crack of noon/ate a leisurely breakfast/Watched a documentary on baboons/Started freaking out/ had to take a walk/Lazy as a rock/around the clock,/as every day is mine to define/or not,/
Free time will mess up your mind/just like fine wine/by the bottle it’s divine/by the case, the taste/is swill for the swine/It’ll mess up your mind:/expensive/sublime/“Free Time,”…/
In this limbo of in between/I reign intangible,/Thank you, Lord for each comedy/and for tea/and for toast/Like any ghost/I howl the most/post midnight, no insight:/all in a day I suppose…
Free time will mess up your mind/just like fine wine/by the bottle it’s divine/by the case, the taste/is swill for the swine/It’ll mess up your mind:/expensive/sublime/“Free Time,”…/
Free time/It's death to the deadline/Free time/Shredder of schedules/Free time/Put some chains on me/Free time/Get a slave galley/Free time/I’ll row the ship of fools/Free time, for the sake of sanity/Enslave me/and save me/from this “Free time*”/
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11. |
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Bye-bye/bye-bye/bye-bye, my/bachelor pad/Bye-bye, Bat Cave/Your walls/have watched me/e-volve/quiet man/from a talking ape/
When first I rambled/through your door/I had no kind of credit score/Décor/by Goodwill/and the Dollar Store/
Determined to make it/on my own/Now I got a love so sweet/
I won’t never/be alone.../
Bye-bye/bye-bye/bye-bye, my/bachelor pad/Bye-bye, Love Shack/
Your ancient ugly carpets/track my last/No looks back/
All the hard knocks/and the hurting,/finance, life, and love/
uncertain/Flirtin’ with disaster/to happy ever after/
I scored a rainbow/off the rain/Later, Darkness/
on the Edge of Town/Hóla,/Penny Lane.../
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These are arguably the best 11 songs of the 32 or so demos I did from January to May of 2012.
My idea was to really, finally, actually do a high-fi recorded in a pro studio and produced by the best producer I know album. I had no kind of money for that up front, but that was an inconsequential detail to me at the time.
I contacted artist/producer extraordinaire and pal, Pat Kearns to be that producer. He agreed to listen to the demos I came up with for each of my five distinctive basses and pick the very best ones to make one KILLER album.
By May, he'd picked these eleven. And I still had no money. And I still don't, dammmit. But I've got eleven swell demos. Good as anything I've released as "finished." So for now, just enjoy these, everybody.
If this lousy economy continues, this album will have to stand as is. If it's gets better, Pat may get his shot at it, finally. Or maybe I'll run another 30 by him and try again.
I should probably get around to releasing all the other demos I did in service of this project, too. Send me an email if you'd like to hear them and I'll spur myself on towards it.
